She was as good a mother-in-law as one could hope for. In fact, Jane Wettstone canceled out all the mother-in-law jokes I’d heard growing up, and she passed away last week unexpectedly.
Cherries are gone. Blueberries are gone. Peaches are gone. Nectarines are gone. Apples are here. Pumpkins are here. Over and over, the seasons change, year after year.
My mom, Gail McPherson, died back in 2005, and it was profoundly sad. It led to upheaval on the farm, and new people arrived to help, to fill in, and also we changed, changed ourselves, changed the business, changed direction.
On beautiful Fall weekends, I still think of how much mom would enjoy the scale of what we do on the farm now, almost 20 years later, and if you enjoy my blog emails, you’d have LOVED Gail’s writing! It was a big change.
My wife, The Lovely Miss Janine, had an incredible mom, too. Jane Wettstone, in her early 80s, was forever a lady who knew how to do stuff. She could make costumes, paint watercolors, organize the Kiwanis Blueberry sale, teach flower arranging, ride horses, make tote bags out of feed sacks, teach elementary school, organize a professional office, stage houses, and on and on and on.
I remember her giddy smile when I drove 2.5 hours to ask for her daughter’s hand in marriage. While she giggled, Janine’s Dad, Jerry, hit me with the classic “Now, no returns!” joke.
Jane was a tireless cheerleader for our kids and me. Sometimes, she seemed more positive and excited about whatever project we were working on at the farm than I was! For instance, she often referred to our daughter as a “D1 Clarinetist” because, as sports terminology goes, the University of Michigan is a D1 school and one of the top clarinet studios in the country.
Something I learned from her was to let kids try stuff. If they had an idea about a project for ArtsFest or a presentation for school, she said, “Cool! Go for it!” If it didn’t work out, she just asked them what they wanted to try next.
It’s that pragmatic spirit that most inspires me. Jane grew up riding horses, and she took a leap in her 70s to get a draft horse, Tootsie, and hop back in the saddle. She achieved “The Century Ride” when she was 80 and Tootsie was 20 (totaling 100 years).
After she passed, we joined Jerry at the retirement village for dinner. Friends offering condolences would say, “Oh, we’ll miss Jane. She made us DO stuff!”
What a joyful spirit to bring to your community. While Jane has moved on, we’ll carry that joyful spirit into this next spirit. I’d like it to be a tribute to Jane, but she’d have nothing to do with that.
It never was about her. Mostly, she just kept doing what I would call the ‘Next Right Thing.’
Seasons change, and life is perishable. I hope you got your peaches before they were gone. I hope you hug your parents or in-laws the next time you see them. I hope you plan a trip with your kids to the farm this fall.
And, if you (or your kids or grandparents) think you’d like to try something new, I hope you say…
“Cool! Go for it!” …then go out and do the Next Right Thing.
We’ll miss you terribly, Jane.
But we’ll see you again – in the next season,
Hugh
P.S. I know I was your favorite son-in-law, Jane, because I was the only one:-)
